From the SF Photo Album: The fog is so thick I have to name it Fogster. Still at San Fran.
So I have been thinking (uh oh), as a godmother to several wonderful babies already, if it's a good idea to choose me as a god mother where god mother means if anything happens to those kids, I am a candidate to parent the child, or I am considered to be a part of "the child's upbringing and personal development". And that I will guide these kids in this bloody journey called life. (It is bloody by the way - we have to experience all the heartbreaking stuff to be alive, yes?)
Maybe it's superstitious definition but enlighten me please what does it mean to be a godparent? I'm sorry for not attending any church teachings, I'm an idiot for not being clear on the responsibilities yet I'm glad my vague idea is still in line with what is the popular definition of being a god parent.
In my reflection, I announced to selected friends, of whose kids I am priviledged to be a god parent, that I will do what the wikipedia says I should do -- I will take part in their child's upbringing and I will dispense advise coming from my worldly experience or lack there of. It's not like I received an applause after I said that, although friends that they are, they assured me whatever advise I dispense it will be valued.
Well the announcement also came with saying, I will no longer be giving gifts to their kids every Christmas, because I've come to realize god parenting seems to be associated with that, the giving of gifts. In my world, I don't want kids to focus on material stuff like the way that we were all brought up, to hunger for gifts more than deeds, more than stories, more than the intangible stuff.
But what will I share? What will I give? Sure, it's tradition to give gifts, I mean, why breakaway? There's such a thing as respecting tradition. I say yes, but who was it who said -- a breakthrough to a different level of consciousness comes if there's bravery to throw away what we are used to?
I'm not saying this is a way to a different level of consciousness or whatever. Sighing here. I guess I just wanted to be a really real god parent, in its purest sense.
So here's my not-yet-sure-if-it's-a-bright-idea. No more gifts. Instead, I have decided to hug my godkids every Christmas (whether they like it or not) and what's more, I will write them long letters, which of course they will not read because they cannot read, but I will ask my friends to keep it until they are old enough to decipher the alphabet and piece together what the heck their Ninang Rose is trying to say and with no judgment they can decide to throw away or keep the letters - something like trash or treasure.
Perceived benefits:
- Supports the environment - no purchase of stuff means possibility of less garbage.
- Possible insights not coming from their parents. (You know how kids are with parents - come on, we've been there, even if they are right and have the wisdom of ages, just because of title and relation, we don't think they're right).
- Keeping connected.
Of course, now after having read this, my friends can feel free to disown me as a godmother to their kids. I will completely understand, we'll still be friends, as I hope I will still be yours.
p.s. I will give them dashing quotes like this: Dear child, "What if a demon
were to creep after you one night, in your loneliest loneliness, and say, 'This
life which you live must be lived by you once again and innumerable times more;
and every pain and joy and thought and sigh must come again to you, all in the
same sequence. The eternal hourglass will again and again be turned and you
with it, dust of the dust!' Would you throw yourself down and gnash your teeth
and curse that demon? Or would you answer, 'Never have I heard anything more
divine'?" of course by the quotable Friedrich Nietszche.
